Red Wine Divine

Story ended

2009-12-28T23:05:00.002+08:00

Well there you go, finally got that full stop.. eventhough it wasnt direct, but its clear enough.

So much for saying it was'nt me being the reason why. It was me all the while

Im tired of it. im just tired of it. theres no point of me trying. Ill only be used. nothing more than just a person thats there when you're in need. And leave me like everyone does.

I dont want say i love you, i dont want to say i hate you. i dont even want to say goodbye.

Its bullshit when people say lightning doesnt strike twice. it does, hard and painful. it bites you in the ass and doesnt want to let it go.

I know

2009-12-28T04:14:00.002+08:00

I know, ill be there for you anytime

I know, ill be patient with everything we go through

I know, ill be the guy for you who holds you in his arms and never lets go

I know, I've already fallen for you.

One more for the sake of it

2009-12-17T01:41:00.002+08:00

Here's a short story.

Guy meets girl. Guy gets a crush on her. he does everything he can to make her happy. he makes the small moments together last. He gets too scared to show his feelings. she goes unnoticed how he really feels. he plays along with the moments he has with her knowing this story of his wont last. his predictions turns true.

She leaves him in the shadows, forgotten, left behind. The heart known to him was lost.
and even after awhile those small memories together still plays along in his brain.
looking up for hope was full of lies playing in his mind.
He soon realises she found someone new. someone better then him. His feeling for being happy for her were not pure. but they were there.

The end.

Im not in love, im just wishing it wont be the same as the story above. I dont want to give up like i always do and let things ruin themselves as they past infront of my eyes. im done reading your cover. give me a chance to let me go through your pages.

Weird thoughts

2009-12-04T23:37:00.002+08:00

Im not sure if im pissed or just down right sad. i always ending up alone.. whats the point of writing this. no one would read it

This is it

2009-11-13T19:30:00.002+08:00

No, im not talking about Micheal Jackson's new movie.. Im talking about the real effing deal. SPM baby.. yeah, its been running around in our minds like hell for the past year.. and guess what, we're 4 days away from it.. all those years are finally coming to an end.. and its ending with a freaking exam that has your future written all over it. So to those who are taking SPM, i wish you the best and GOOD LUCK.

this isnt helping at all

2009-11-10T14:50:00.002+08:00

Getting stressed out about exams is already enough.. but at this certain moment, i just HAD to get myself involved into liking someone.. and it sucks when you start thinking about them..

i treat my blogs like a confession box, so here goes..

For the past month i could finally say, i've got someone to go for.. things just rolled along, texting you a whole lot just made me happy for some reason. finally thinking that i could like someone without seeing the consequences..but knowing you from the first layer is enough to know how you are around things.. Pessemist is the best word i would say. and to me, i know thats a bad thing. The cup you're looking at is half empty. im just wising for you to give me a chance to let me lighten up that black world of yours.. i know theres a bright star shining in you somewhere.. you've just got to look for it..

thoughts of you

2009-11-07T01:16:00.002+08:00

well, since things are alot more secluded here.. ill let things out here.. besides its been awhile since my last post

its weird to finally like someone after awhile. but even that still makes me feel weird about things. but she still manages to makes things happy.. i hope theres a happy ending in this new chapter.. im hoping shes the one..

Battle of the sites

2009-10-19T23:00:00.003+08:00

Since everyone has lately shifted to Tumblr, i decided to make one as well.. and i had no idea how awesome that site is.. so basicly i was scared that i would eventually totally forget about my Blogger.. it seems like its the battle between Facebook and Myspace.. i use facebook alot more and therefore like it more, but somehow i've never forgotten about my Myspace.. i still manage to come by and check it from time to time.. As a conclusion, i know ill do the same to Blogger.. cause i started off here.. and its bad if i just totally forgot about it.. so dont worry Blogger, ill never leave you...

Drummer in Boxers

2009-10-13T00:17:00.003+08:00

I had a study session with Maison in the moring, i just love days out with the guy..
Anyways, the weather got a little too hot for us, so we just decided to go Parade for a few rounds of Daytona... and he just came up with a last minute idea to go jamming so we invited James and Walter to jam with.. so we walked all the way to the studio in 15 to jam.. but it was worthwhile cause i got to finally play drums after weeks without it.. to me, its a way of releifing stress. and a workout.. the band was just random, but none of us really cared.. as long theres music flowing properly, and it was good enough for us.. now, im just really tired cause of a long ass day.. and somehow im still wide awake.. my system is not working it used to no more.. i get less sleep, and more time awake.. im gonna have eyebags sooner than ever.. shit

Yesterday's story

2009-10-12T23:48:00.002+08:00

no, as i mean literally, this was yesterday's story.. i could'nt help but to blog about it.. it was a REAL long day but it was worthwhile..

I went out at 9 to meet up Adrees at McD near Taylors, so i had no choice to walk in the rain all the way to 15 just for the guy.. i was wet like a dog by the time i got there. and we headed off for pool after that.. We decided to go watch Surrogates with Farhan, and we just rolled along to pyramid by cab from there on..
The movie was real good. it showed how lazy and over cautious human turned to be in the future.. but i dont wanna ruin the movie for everyone..After the movie we Farhan had the idea to go window shopping, and yea it sounds gay, but who cares, its the only way you can try on new clothes without buying it.

Anyways, Adrees and i then headed back to 15 to meet up with the other guys.. They planned to go for Amir's open house in Shah Alam, so basicly we didnt have a choice but to tag along, or just be left alone.. By the time we arrived at the KTM station, Adrees bailed out at the last seconds for Sofia that was comming to Subang.. so it was just me and my fellow malay gang, and vimal which i count as malay as well since he talks like one.. HAHA.. I havent Ride a train in years, so it felt kind of weird taking public transport thats stuck on tracks and goes slower then a motorcycle.. We stopped at Batu tiga train station, and took a cab to Amir's house.. OUr cab driver got lost and Anen decided to just get dropped off nearby a round-about.. so we had to jump over a fence to get into the housing area compund, and my knee hit the railing of the fence and it was god damn painfull..

We finally reached the house 15 minutes later.. thanks to Anen.. I had a good few grabs of the satay that was served, and a whole lots of laughs at the dinner table, and i mean ALOT.. we headed up to his room, and Aimran could'nt help by grabbing a Bibi gun that was on the table, and pointed the gun towards everyone.. so there we were, grown 17 year old guys screaming like girls trying to avoid a plastic bullet.. Vimal had a not so great idea by taking cover in Amir's Closet, and all of us pretended that we left while amir was holding the closet door.. and i swear, those was the funniest 5 minutes of my life.. i was holding on not to laugh through out the whole time.. we eventually gave up and let him out..

All in all, for a tiring day like that, migrating from place to place, it was
seriously an awesome day..its just too bad Adrees could'nt join us for it

listening to A love's song with a broken heart

2009-10-11T04:24:00.002+08:00

i dont really like to blog about my depressions, but since its 4.am and i've got nothing to do, here goes

i feel too much of alone these days, dont really know why... probably its just me getting too emotional over small things but its just me listening to my nature..
i've gotta admit that nothing has gotten to make me happy lately, makes me wanna bust out into to tears for no good reason.. its like all the hard times are just waiting to burst out.. i just need the perfect situations to do it.. stressfulness is just gaining and i have no idea how to release it..
This state of depression is the toughest one i've been through i would say.. the fact where just nothing makes me happy anymore , while everyone else is having the times of their lives, im still stuck at the same state where i was probably 3 years ago. god life sucks.. i dont even know what the words im saying anymore..

Things you never noticed while you were a child

2009-10-08T01:09:00.002+08:00

This is freakin hillarious!!.. i got this from a friend on Facebook.. its a wonder what were our reactions when we were a child

worst day ever

2009-10-05T04:35:00.002+08:00

It starts from last night where i was being all stressed out and i had nothing to calm me down, so i hit the hay earlier than usual.. the next thing i knew, it was already 12 in the afternoon.. so basicly, i overslept.. which meant i got a really bad headache.. its not the painfull one, but the sleepy-headache one.. eventhough i already slept for 12 hours straight..
Anyways, i had to meet up with Adrees by 2.30 so i just went out without thinking if i could walk or not.. then half way, i felt like i needed transport.. thankfully there was a cab passing by to drop me off at AC. By the time i got there my head felt like mush.. Vimal gave the idea to go and vomit, and suprisingly it felt a little better. and i STILL managed to beat them at pool while i was having my painfull arms, and a headache..

at the end of the day,I felt too lazy to walk back and decided to just take a cab infront of McD.. and those motherfuckers charge over 10 bucks.. JUST from 15 to 17.. i just couldnt bear with the headache so i just considered on paying 10 bucks.. and the driver, was the worst driver i've ever gotten.. worse than that drunk driver i gotten a few months back .. hahah
He basicly horned at everything, i think one of them was even a burger stall for some reason, he threw a plastic container out of the window while driving at high speed on the main road, he smelt like trash, he looked like trash, he even sounded like trash.. im not trying to be all judgemental about this, but i had a pissed off day, and he just made it feel like it was the cherry ontop of the ice-cream..

He had to pay off his debt to some guy in Sunway, so i got dragged ALL the way the way to some apartments and i had to wait 10 minutes in the cab by myself.. he tried to be friendly by communicating, but i could'nt understand him half of the time. so i just nodded..
By the time he dropped me off, he really appoligized , i think it was because of my fucked-up-im-pissed-off kind of look i gave him just before i paid the cab fee..
So finally i reached home, thinking i could watch some Tv, have a nice cup of Teh-o, and just to be in a quite enviroment..
BUT, no... all of my relatives were around visiting.. all 27 of them.. not to mention the little ones playing with my stuff in my room.. So it was noisy, i had a headache that was about to expload my brain, my arms that cant be straightend and were still painfull as hell, my throat that was dehydrated, AND gastric pain that would'nt stop annoying me..

what better way to officially say my life sucks right?

unbearable pain

2009-10-03T03:43:00.002+08:00

so there i go, i got too ambitious by working out again.. i promised myself no to do any weights untill i got under the 88kg mark.. but no, i got paranoid and now i tore my arm muscles, and it hurts as HELL i tell ya.. feels worse than a broken arm.. im just glad my left arm doesnt feel as bad as my right.. im gonna stick to just jogging from now on till i hit my target properly... all i need is a bit of struck of luck to get the job done before my deadline.. and a whole lot of painkillers for this pain

Boys in boxers with a bottle of Corona

2009-09-27T22:33:00.005+08:00

I finally had a trully "raya" day with my boys today.. just good plain fun goin around when i know i get to hang out with them.. we all had a good lunch at my house since Adrees inscisted it.. Maison decided to come at the last minute.. and somehow all of them came the same time.. so it was set prepped.. bunch of guys, with a car, and 2 of us with tones of raya money.. heh
By the time we got to Maisons house, things turned out to look like another bob marley song.. Shisha, ciggs, and a few beers, it would've been epic if we had weed, but no..not for now.. anyways, for me, that felt like heaven. now i have to face back to reality that Spm is in a month or so.. i NEED to staple my eyes to the books from now on.. sigh.. i had a really good week though.. Best Raya i ever had i would say..

Gautham looking really freaky

Corona for life

Turbog sucks, but maison's shisha rocks

Ordinary

2009-09-25T00:06:00.001+08:00

i've just watched Spiderman 2 on Youtube, and listening to the soundtrack reminded me how really awesome the soundtrack was.. this one is my favourite

You lied

2009-09-24T23:21:00.002+08:00

I have never gotten to blog on my poems, so i was thinking to just share one of them..

I wake up,
By her side and see the sun shine,
Right through the window pane,
Lights her face,
A soft amber glow,
And i really want to know,

Could this angel be mine,
Or will it just last a while,

Can't deny,
She made me feel like,
There's nothing else i need in my life,
How could I not see,
The feelings were fading
She was just waiting to go,

Things dont look so fine,
I think I fell behind,

There are scenes in my head,
I'd rather die than to face,
But here I stand,
Knowing that she's in love,
And it's not with the one,
That she promised to love, till the end of time,
She lied...

I held on,
To the hopes that she put in my,
Head everytime that she
Smiles,
Now I wonder,
was all that heartache worthwhile,

Love lies covered in lies,
Hearts have are broken and hurtful words spoken,
Can you look into my eyes..

Do you think you were perfect,
While I made the mistakes,
Then why do you feel,
The guilt burning inside,
As tears fill up your eyes,
You know you lied,

You said that you'll come back,
But i guess you never meant that,
Now you tell me things,
That put scenes in my head,
I'd rather die than to face,
But here I stand,
Knowing that you're in love,
And it's not with the one,
That you promised to love, till the end of time,
You lied...

Cherry flavoured

2009-09-23T21:46:00.004+08:00

had an awesome day with maison today.. we havent gotten to actually hang out, so this was just the perfect thing we needed.

Started off at my house at 9, my mom was supprisingly kind enough to let me use the car to go for some breakfast nearby.. felt good to finnaly have a good conversation with the guy plus the morning enviroment, it was perfect for me..
Then we shifted to parade to buy myself a pair of slippers, and maison being the guy who he is, goes and wastes his money buying a bluetooth headset.. bought shisha filling from carrefour and took the bus all the way to his house from there on..

We eventually got "high" with the shisha in his room while watching Bruno on his laptop.. so basicly for us, we were watching a movie thats already funny as hell, but funni-er thanks to the shisha.. and i swear, that movie's not for the faint of heart, especially if your straight.. if you've watched it, you'll know what i mean..

So i went home 7-ish, took the bus, and i've got to say, when you have a good serious song to play through your headphones while looking out the window, gives you the space and time to think whatever you want.. somehow it even helped me clear my mind...
so basicly, the whole day was unplanned, and to me, thats what makes up for a perfect day... Mais, Love you bro..

2009-09-19T03:24:00.003+08:00

had a real good night tonight.. had buka with close friends of mine plus shisha, plus having Gautham as our trusty driver.. had a few good drinks at Lionel's party but i just practicaly had a blast by just having fun with friends.. it feels awesome to finally hang out without having the feeling of getting caught...the days of SPM is getting closer and closer.. and im just haninging in there and get through it as calm as possible..

He's finally back

2009-09-17T22:40:00.002+08:00

i trully love this song.. THIS is how his songs should usually be

A style

2009-09-17T22:38:00.001+08:00

look closer, and tell me what you see.. i laughed my ass off over this once..

clothe hunting..

2009-09-14T23:39:00.004+08:00

i dont know how i kept the same pose

had a good walk around and around pyramid with my mom today.. wanted to buy almost anything that looked good on me... but i only ended up getting just a few shirts.. shopping never felt so tiring.. i mean, i walk alot, but i have no idea why i felt like i ran a marathon today.. my feet were about to break apart. im still on a hunt for the perfect jeans and shorts.. thats another blog ill continue on..

Teenage dirtbag

2009-09-13T17:45:00.001+08:00

i feel like a loser... sigh

Bloated

2009-09-12T23:33:00.004+08:00

I finally had a buka puasa outside today and had it at Shangrila Hotel KL.. we had it last year so it wassnt such of a biggie for me .. all i know i ate like a pig.. the food is the best i tell ya.. so many variaties. i was too full till i had to find a sofa to rest on... it was cool to see my dad being the one being the boss and everything.. felt akward hearing him and his clients talking about money... makes me feel thankfull for not being intreaseted in banking and what not.. so many numbers to go by..

Dreams for fools

2009-09-09T23:25:00.002+08:00

You know when you get those dreams about that certain someone, and when you wake up you find out it was just a dream and you feel so dissapointed that it wasnt true, so you just want to forget about the whole thing and move on right?
well, those dreams came back to hanut me.. and its one of the most annoying things you can ever get when you're already in a whole lot of pressure and depression.. but i've gotta say, it put a smile on my face... its like god wants me to feel at least abit of happiness in some way.. and im guessing this is his way of repaying my wants... right now, i dont want those dreams to end... cause reality's a bitch.. and it would'nt hurt to live in a wonderland once in a while if you know what i mean... :)

this song trully brings backy my memories.. its too bad i couldnt actually sing it when i was suppose to.

late wishes.. sorry bro

2009-09-09T18:43:00.003+08:00

Somehow, Muiz's birthday was totaly forgotten from my memory.. and im trully sorry for that my bro.. i just wanna make it official by saying it here, so HAPPY BIRTHDAY.. love you my man..

Dance to the music

2009-09-07T04:03:00.004+08:00

in Euphoria 08

yeah, its what i really really miss the most.. being able to just be in a club listening to pumping music and dancing up to strangers while hoping not getting rejected by it..i know its sounds lame comming from me, but yeah i like to dance.. nothing wrong with that right?. what more can i do, i am who i am.. its better than those lame bastards who stands at the edges of the dance floor ,just waiting for a miricale for a girl to come and talk to them.. all i know, im gonna PAR-TAY on when Spm's over with... i can feel the anticipation building up already..

2012

2009-09-07T00:43:00.002+08:00

if you know about that movie 2012 saying that end of days will happen by then, heres abit of info that i found from good old youtube. and yea hearing predictions of the world ending is just fucked up... if you're really intrested watch part 1 till part 6

1 day break

2009-09-02T09:01:00.001+08:00

blogging in a CC feels weird for me.. but who cares.. getting to skip school's always fun for me..

Proof that Malaysia exsists..

2009-08-28T02:21:00.002+08:00

this seriously shows how Our malaysian cars just cant compete with other cars in the world

chill pill

2009-08-26T22:41:00.003+08:00

Getting to spend time with some good old friends and getting to drive their car, and to have shisha all in one night is seriosly what i need to relax my mind away from studies and everything else.. Yesterday was just a bullshit day.. everyone could'nt give me space and just leave me alone... so having a good time today was the saviour for all the stress boggling up my brain that cant handle too much at once.. i just wish evryday was relaxing.. sigh.

Human Masterpiece

2009-08-24T22:59:00.004+08:00

The biggest name in the car making buisness has litterally pushed the boundries of making a beautiful car
It called the 458 Italia. And i swear, its the most stunning car ever made by man..
Really gives me the boost to persue my dream of being a car designer so maybe one day, my designs my just be praised on another person's blog in the futre...

Hell walks the earth

2009-08-23T15:31:00.002+08:00

I was having a random hang out with Adrees last night, just simply took the keys and went out the house. we just had a relaxing chill at the padang in 17.. talked alot, caught up witha few things and had pretty much a real satisfying laughs
Out no where, we were busy talking about how this whole H1N1 would be a desease that brings the dead come back to life.. as i mean Zombies. and i have to say, our imagination went wild thinking about it. and by the time i got back, i took the time to watch Dawn Of the Dead.. its a typical zombie movie.. almost everyone gets infected and the ones that are alive are trying to stay alive..

So before that, Adrees and I were thinking what would've happned if something like that would happen in Malaysia.. cause practicaly every house in Malaysia has their own gates, grills, and some with really big doors. So its safe to say, that we here in Malaysia would survive if there were a crisis like that were to happen..
Have you ever thought of it?.. i mean, H1N1 is already spreaded around everywhere in the world, they may have already have walking dead people already but the goverment are just keeping it a secret... who knows right?.. if it is true, im gonna do anything to survive..

"need, water,dying, now"

2009-08-23T15:23:00.001+08:00

yea, those are the words "muslim" people are gonna be saying the whole month. while
some of us is just not giving a shit about fasting.. i got through the whole day, but i cracked today and drank the water supply i kept. heh. whats the point anyway, im not even "sah" to fast if i even wanted to... im just not eating so i could at least lose some weight by not eating much for this month..

BGU 8700

2009-08-19T23:14:00.006+08:00

I even wasted almost 2 hours just polishing the whole car by myself

Adrees being my Co-driver for the month

Im not sure if most of you dont know about my times with the car on the most amazing month ever..so here's the story..

Well, my parents left for Haji for a month last year and left me with the car. A Nissan Cefiro 2.0.. the thought of going anywhere i wanted was so possible.. but to me.. the car was just more than just a transport machine, it was more like a baby to me.. it had a really powerfull engine, a relaxed leather interior, air-conditioning of course, and my personal favourite, A jacked up sound system.. basicly everything you need to have blast inside a car..

I still remember one of the days where i picked up Adrees, and he could hear me 10 blocks away with the sound system i had.. and the ride of the car was so smooth.. pressing the peddle was just effortless, i hit 180km/h once with the car.. and it did it without breaking a sweat.. i used the car almost everyday to and to almost everywhere.. i would actually say, getting stuck in a traffic jam in that car, was no matter at all.. and the best part is, i didnt even had lisence for the whole month of using the car.. and there was'nt even a scratch on it after a month of me using it..

But sadly, my dad just couldnt help by getting a Mercedes, so without notice he sold it off for an E-class. thinking back, i didnt even get to say goodbye to it..shit
If i were to say what did i miss the most in the month of December, without a doubt it would be the Cefiro.. if i had the chance to buy it back one day, if its still in once peice, i would..*salute*.

Times of pressure.

2009-08-19T23:05:00.002+08:00

I seriously hate this time of the year, where the moments of Trials and SPM is just dead smacked at your face.. there is no room for cooling down or rest what so ever..
Everyday i think of how my life after Spm would be, everyone would just go wild when the last paper of ours ends.. gosh, its so exciting just thinking about it..

But thank god, if it were'nt for the friends i have, i would be a nut job by now.. thinking of the times where i was actually having tones of fun and nothing to bother me was the ones i trully miss the most.. i just want my life back..

Full streached day....

2009-08-16T00:50:00.002+08:00

And it was.. had a FUCKING exam today.. ON A SATURDAY!!.. and its not just any exam, Additional Mathematics SPM Trials exam.. woke up thinking i could finally rest my eyes and wake late for once, but no.. the school found a way to MAKE people come to school on a saturday. and their solution? exams of course..bloody fuck..

Anyways, my day didnt just end there, my mom was too busy to pick me up and send me here to there, so i had to walk back from school..aaannd, walk to Metropolitan for another crash course.. but, hey, i finally got to actually spend time with Irsyad and Adrees together again.. just like it was back in the old days..Adrees almost wanted to skip whole thing thanks to vimal's devil-ish words and influences.. But he managed to smack the sense back into him..
I have to say the Economi crash course was pretty good. Actually got something to write down and to have something in my brain about Econs..

Im wondering already how stressed i would be during the weeks of SPM itself, cause its only Trials now, i wonder how i would be when the real deal comes..
Eughh, its not a pretty sight.. GOD, just let me go through this with ease.

"Mission is a go"

2009-08-10T00:26:00.004+08:00

So it was just a guys day out today, no girlfriends what so ever.. just plain guy time with some pool,lots and lots of laughter and bealching and a really really good movie up in pyramid to fuss about afterwards, and fuss we did alright..

GI.JOE caught me by strom.. it was AMAZINGLY good. its not the fact where the action gets you going, but the Suprise of the details and the movie itself that leaves you tingling.. i swear, when it came to Transformers 2, i was it expecting it to be good, and it was. but for a movie that issnt AS big such as this, came with a BIG outcome.. The lines coming out from peoples mouths in the cinema is already an example on how awesome this movie truly is.. "WOAH", "SHIT!""OMG".... From the hottest casts ever, to the Excelerating suits they wear is just... just.. GAAAHH.. its already leaving me speachless..

and i LOVE Snake Eyes who's this asskicking ninja kinda of guy who apparently, doesnt talk at all through out the movie.. but with an entrance and all the fighting scences like his, you wouldnt need words to love him even more.

As some already may have said.. it might even beat out transformers.. which leaves me on the fence. Both are just top of the line movies, and cant ever choose between these 2 for this year.. but then again, cars, chicks,and alien robots, has always been my ideal way of thinking of a fabuloutasticfuckingly good movie.. im out of words, i just cant choose.. for some of you guys, do all the critisising you want.. I'll be just fine ontop of the fence..

Modern Maths

2009-08-08T22:14:00.002+08:00

well, i had a crash course on Mod Maths for a whole 6 hours up in Metropolitan college.. felt good at first cause the teacher was good... finally had progress on reveiwing all the topics.. apparently, they changed teachers up to half the way. sooner or later, we all just didnt give a shit about concetrating, cause he wasnt as good as the previous teahcer.. nother the less, at least i got something prductive to do on a saturday..

2 down 2 to go

2009-08-05T23:14:00.001+08:00

FUCK.. yes, im annoyed, so sue me.. im tired talkin about the things i want and need.. i just realised the more unexpected things are, the better things are. so im finding a way to just block the world out of my life.. nothing except books, and books.. dont be shattered when i jump off a building..

"Cover me!!"...

2009-08-02T17:40:00.002+08:00

my glorious teamates who got me through, and i look like fuck

so yea, woke up this morning late enough to piss my dad off for not being on time but he still waited about another 10 minutes. we went to Gombak for a game of paintball organised by Maybank and Petronas.. and i was the lucky child to represent my dad since he twisted his ankle a few days back..

It was my second time ever playing, and i gotta admit my nurves were pumping..
I was in Group 8 wich were basicly awesome.. 2 amongst them play paitball alot, so i was less scared since i THOUGHT i had my back covered from them..
we hit the first round,and i was just basicly a sitting duck.. i had my goggles fogged out and i was out of bulletts.. i just tried my best by getting the apponents flag in time.
it didnt work.. i "died" after the second shot.. The same thing happened when it was the second game..

But eventually i got used to the gun and the pain, and i knew how to control my breathing so i wouldnt fog up my goggles all the time. and finally i got few kills.. then it turned out our points were just enough to get us to the Semi-finalls... and the best part is, they gave us unlimited life.. so we can get shot as many times possible but still try and save our flag..
It was god damn exausting, cause the course itself, was at a really steap hill and we had to run up and down to get back to base, which is something you've gotta do once you're shot. we lost in the end.. but we were still running for 3rd or 4th placing, which meant we had to battle for the title one more time..

6th and final round for me, was THE best.. i was totally protected by 2 layers of shirts and one large jacket and a hoodie. To make it feel better, i had a little push from my earphones and the touch of music in my ears while i was playing the game.. and it totally worked.. i killed more over ten times and got to even go close enough to pitch our flag in the middle of the battle feild. it was epic, felt like in COD or Counter Strike or something .ducking, and running and sliding all over the muddy floor, best fun i've had all year . we got 3rd place in the end and a RM50 gift voucher from Isetan..

Definately, i love paintball more than any other game.. just the ammount of fun and adrenalin i was getting from the game is priceless.. i am sure signing up for another match next year..

Bounded by the rules

2009-07-30T09:29:00.002+08:00

I NEED A FLY DAY.. yes, i need to ponteng school.. im too stressed from the rules and teachers that make school a living hell.. seriously, im gonna break soon if i dont get my mind straight.. Adrees, sofia, and muiz.. if you read this, you will know how desperate i am.. so please do a favor and lets FLY

family day

2009-07-27T16:09:00.004+08:00

well i got back from my "family day" yesterday.. and i've got to say that it was kind of fun.. i was just happy enough to get out of the house and take my mind of things when i have time for myself..

getting to spend time with the family for once felt good. especially with my dad.. seeing him dance for a warm up the organised made my stomach drop down to the floor cause of how amazingly funny he looked.. its like seeing that Michellin mascot dance.. hahahah

It was helled at The Palace Of the Golden Horses.. and owh my gawd, the place is freaking grand. i mean GRAND. i've never seen that many fake horses in a hotel before.. i understood the phrase of "one of the most expensive hotel in malaysia" cause everything about the place is tip top. sort of i was playing with the gadgets they installed to operate the whole room the whole time . i LOVE the beds, i slept like i baby when i slept on it.. it felt like i was on a cloud. literally. it just sinks you into the featherly like mattress..*drool*. the food was so good , if Paris hilton would stay there, she would go fat in a week. i swear, the whole experience of staying at a really expensive hotel comes with a good outcome.. now its back to books ALL over again.. fuck....

Oh whats the point

2009-07-25T00:39:00.002+08:00

my mind's just practicaly lost.. i cant think properly anymore. its one of those times where you just feel like giving up on everything.. and that moment might just be right now for me.. like i said.. i lost part of myself somewhere and i just cant find it..

11 Years

2009-07-17T10:40:00.004+08:00

Today's the day where a dear friend of mine finally turns 17.. Happy Birthday Adrees. Seriously, i dont know how fast 11 years passed so fast man..

pictures that didnt make it in time:

Tagged, shit..

2009-07-16T14:57:00.002+08:00

5 things in your bag
1. Journal
2. Economi notes
3. pencil case
4. my black book
5. calculator

5 things in your wallet
1. 2 tags from Euphoria m.o.s
2. guitar pick
3. young picture of me
4. I.C
5. old europen money

5 favourite things in your room
1. stereo
2. dumbells
3. Air-conditioning
4. big mirror
5. somfy bed

5 things you'd want to do in the near future
1. lose weight and buff up
2. get my driver lisence
3. get a girlfriend
4. Upgrade my computer
5. finally get my Ducati

5 things you're doing right now
1. doing this survey
2. texting my tuition teacher to replace class
3. online on facebook and myspace
4. checking new Top Gear vids on youtube
5. thinking on what to eat

5 people you want to tag
1. Adrees
2. Muiz
3. Sofia
4. Adruce
5. Elaine

story for a lonely guy

2009-07-16T14:31:00.003+08:00

14/3/2008

its annoying where i know how well you're doing with your life.. it sucks to know that im still that same guy who never made it anywhere.

I miss everything

2009-07-15T23:36:00.004+08:00

well i cant say much on whats going on with the life i know of right now cause.. if i did tell about it, it might just make anyone who reads this fall asleep cause its just the god damn same old.. Literally. i mean, waking up for school and just wasting my 5 hours in school doing pretty much nothing, then back home, tuition.. and thats it.. a freaking schedual i would say..i could actually count how many times i've had at least abit of fun through out these months..

i miss the old days where everyday was a new chapter, and things that i could just look forward to. people that was there every second of the day with me made it even better. Now, some of us got into a relationship, some just became quite and laying low as possible from everyone, and some are just not as close to as we were before.. including parts of MYself changed.. cause theres seriously not much happiness going on. the only thing that keeps me sane now is just the memories that are unforgetable.. its safe to say that it wouldnt hurt to live the memories once more..

I want C4's

2009-07-09T09:36:00.004+08:00

so it was an ordinary morning for me, felt good about goin to school and i just felt the urge to study.. i seriously did. it was like the side of me was changing and trying to overcome my bad habbits..
well, ill let you know, that all of that was just a seemless way to phsyc you out.

I was on my way to Agama, and out of no where, PMS called me to head for the dewan.. including adrees, and almost everyone i knew.. it turned out that we were called cause of we were" Budak-budak yang bermasalah".. and i was one of them.. why?? i dont know. it was random call from all the discipline teachers.. probably it was because the day's when i skipped class etc etc..

Encik Mokhtar,our dear headmaster.. came in the hall, giving all of us this smirk face of his.. some of us were probably wondering if we're getting expelled or something..
Well, the guy started giving us his lecture about how irresponsible, reckless, and rude we are towards the school and teachers.. he was making statements like we havent heard all of this from our parents before.. saying that we should be thrown away from this school so they can live a life in SU in peace.

The thing is, some of us has learnt the lessons, and are trying to move on.. for instance?. me. adrees. muiz.gautham.. and all the guys that i know of that is trying to change.. ever since i got back my results, it gave me a clear tight slap.. so getting to repeat that feeling again when i've already moved on, pissed the hell out of me..
i was literally imagining me blowing up the school with C4's when the teachers was giving their lectures..i felt like wacking the shit out of every teacher that came near me.. i bet to you, if all of us had balls to do that today, we would have gone to jail by now and the school would be discipline teacher free..

so in the end, i eneded up leaving the hall pissed off, a slightly bad haircut from Pek Ngoh, and a whole lot more reasons why i should hate school.

Stiggy

2009-07-03T19:36:00.005+08:00

Okay, ive got to admit. im addicted to Top Gear. Eventhough they dont have it on tv here in Malaysia, but i enjoy it enough by watching it on youtube.. the cast is just hillarious and they make you seriously fall in love with cars and i just adore the show. Anyways, they have this racing driver which they use him for testing cars out and by giving them a time lap for every review for a car. He's known as the Stig and theres something about him that i just love.. well just recently, they revealed who the Stig really is, and you wont believe who it is..

Feeling good

2009-07-02T00:28:00.004+08:00

yes, i do, i feel good. finally. not because of winning or getting anything, but just the whole feeling like theres nothing bothering you. thats all i've ever wanted in life. To have nothing to bother you what so ever.

Right now, im just trying my way as it is, study and revise as much as i can.. this is the literate point where i sacrifice my time and not go out. and i mean not at all.. my bad grades gave me a slap to the face. so im trying my best to change as much as i can during these four months for SPM.. and ill be happy enough to meet my old self back after that.. Sigh*patience is a virtue*.. thats all in my mind right now.

And i've got to do something about my eating habbits lately.. ive been seriously eating the things like i said i wassnt suppose to last 2 months ago.. its so hard losing weight. so many things i have to put into mind to not grow fatter.. i have to start doing something now or i wont win that 50 bucks bet with muiz we made.. no worries im strong.. ill figure something out sooner or later.

Open day

2009-06-27T18:32:00.002+08:00

The worst thing any sort of student would hate to go through.. i personaly hate it.. it intrudes the space between having a life in school and life at home. parents would suddenly know what we've been up to and you've got no where to run.

It has been rough for me already, egg: no tv,no computer,no gym ,no goin out. i mean as im typing this, i despreatly used my sisters comp.... so yea.. im fucked for these 4 months till i SPM's finally over... i just need a way to like books and boring subjects from now on.. this gives out the term "life is never happy for long".. it makes you feel like having a gun and pulling the trigger.. fuck life

Rest In Peace Mike

2009-06-26T16:09:00.002+08:00

This is how MUCH people appriceated him.. including freaking inmates

who needs girls when you have music

2009-06-26T15:28:00.001+08:00

Im pissed, im annoyed, im just not myself.. im fucking tired of these feelings

"Fate rarely calls upon us on our choosing"

2009-06-25T00:15:00.008+08:00

HOLY FUCK!..i've only got five words to describe how im feeling right now. TRANSFORMERS REVENGE OF THE FALLEN..

The Fallen

This movie wowed me more than i expected.. it had all the original parts for the first movie, but imagine double the size, no wait quadrupal it.. im am dead serious.. i could feel shivers running up through my spine from the moment Optimus Prime talked.. every single scene from the movie was just immense and well worth while.. everything was just whole lot cooler.. Micheal Bay should get a bow to what he has done with this movie..

this sequal reall shows how good the collaboration between the army and the Autobots.. no matter how many Decepticons were in the movie, The autobots still kicked ass.. literally.. i mean seeing Bumblebee and Optimus Prime throwing punches and side kicks to even back flips, is just so.... so...GOD DAMN JAW DROPPING. They seriously showed their fighting skills in this one.. I swear to god, to those who would miss out on movie like this for other events are missing out on life. i spent the whole day smiling thingking of the movie.. and i know ill be watching more than once. like i said, easly THE best movie of the year!!!

they seriously had to run for their lives

hes a lucky ass

can she look any hotter!?

I would have him as a gaurdian any day

Its the part where he kicks ASS

hes an idol

"Thani! Thani! Thani! Thani!"

2009-06-22T22:50:00.004+08:00

Thanks to adrees's last minute plan to skip school today, we spent more than half an hour to beg Muiz and Vimal to come along since he didnt call them the night before.

anyways, after that we headed off to pyramid by cab, and I , Adrees, and sofia got into one cab first, while vimal and muiz, took a seperate cab since theres no space for 5 people at once.
So on our way there in the cab, the driver asked why theres so many school kids walking outside of school, and i said theres something going on which issnt that important.. the guy thought i was in college, so i played along. Then he kept on mumbling about how disrespectful all the teenagers are being by smoking under age, skipping school etc,etc.. it occured to me his tone of voice was familliar.. Adrees typed a text on his phone and showed it to me saying "he sounds drunk"..

so i ended up summing up all his words and actions plus his very unsteady driving.. it hit me.. WE'RE IN A CAB WITH A DRUNK DRIVER.. mumble after mumble and i just tried my best to play along with the guy and give my own comments on "teenagers".that was funny for me. adrees was trying his best not to laugh at the back and i just held it in all while long.. as soon i got out of the cab, i walked behind a pillar and started laughing my ass off... it was extremly beyond funny..

sigh, the things you bump in to during a fly day are always priceless.

"Zero to Hero"

2009-06-22T00:23:00.003+08:00

I dont know why, but Disney has been playin all their old cartoon movies.. as just of last week, they played Toy Story. and that brought back all of my memories as i was a child watching it. and now, Hercules.

and owh god, its such a freaking good movie.. maybe its just because how young i was when i first watched it and i never really gave the gratitued to take in the details..and i loved every part when those black lady's sang.. made me sing along to some of the songs which i some how remembered.. i would say Hercules is my favourite Disney movie... ill make sure i buy a DVD one day, and maybe keep it with me as i grow older..

Megan really shows how a hot a cartoon can be.. shes a literate jaw dropper in the cartoon world. she definately gave me one.

Raise the bass

2009-06-20T21:15:00.005+08:00

I know how much of a shuffler as that sounds or looks,and i know some people hate it but i love raves. since i randomly started playing through my computer's playlist today, i found all my techno and trance songs way back when i was a shuffler and it made me so liquid, it made me flow with the songs...and yea,thats right, i USED to be a fat fuck shuffler.but no matter what, i miss going to heart pumping music outdoor events.. the last time i went was UV-Nation up in damansara One Utama roof top back when i was in form 3!. and it was freakingly good.. but sadly, i didnt know shit what to do at the time when techno and trance songs play..

its just the feeling that is so immence for me.. it just makes you wanna get loose and move to the songs that the Dj spins.. im surely keeping my eyes and ears open for the up comming ones near by. its definatly gonna be in my list of "things to do this year"

the legendary Benny Benassi on stage that day at UV-Nation.. made my night an even more blast.

Revenge is near

2009-06-19T00:06:00.006+08:00

its the movie i've anxiously ,anxiously been waiting for.. other movies that i've watched this year has never gave me much of goosebumbs like this one does.. and im confidently enough that this movie is gonna easly be the best movie of the year.. i cant wait for this upcomming wednesday... all i know im gonna enjoy every second of it.

loohcs skcus

2009-06-17T20:59:00.003+08:00

you know when you get that feeling when you think it feels like months but its only been days, well have that same feeling right now.. and its about school i tell ya.

since holidays ended, i was supprisingly enough to be happy to back to school to see people i know and get back my results from the previous exams. but i had no idea i would crack that fast to get out of school. every day feels such a dull nower days.. i spend half of the time walking around class and doing my own buisness in class and ill be eagerly waiting for the day to end. and some of the teachers has just been grinding up my patience meter.. they tend to litterally schold for nothing. and i mean nothing.. if its the women, i would probably understand due to PMS or something, but the men as well? wtf?.. i just want the year to end already

Cefiro is still my baby

2009-06-13T00:55:00.005+08:00

well for the past 4 days i've been jolly using the C-Rv and i would say it helped me get around easly and thats all im thankfull for right now.
BUT there was just ONE thing that got me pissed off and annoyed with while using the car for the past 4 days, and its called TRAFIC JAM..

i was on the way back from maison's house which is USJ 1, and USUALLY, ill get out of the area way before rush hour hits the roads, but somehow, i was too late. Me and James became one of the victims that had to suffer the traffic jam.. even worse, we didnt have a lighter for our cigerettes. james even had an idea to ask from car to car to ask for one but both of us didnt have the balls for it. so as stressfull as it is, my petrol was low, and we had to off the air-conditioning to save fuel. so it was uncomfortable, and hot and there was nothing to calm our minds besides the burned CD's of mine. it felt forever to get out of, period. we finally got out after 45 MINTUES of waiting.. i was literally screaming of happiness out the window cause i could actually feel the air blowing through the window and to finally not feel stuck at a spot for hours..

the hectic image of what i was in for almost and hour

you can see the ammount of fuel i have left

i was despreat to get out and i felt too tired to keep on stepping on the brake

Im still KING

2009-06-11T20:16:00.003+08:00

okay fuck, the time where i said that "james got better at pool", well serious shit, we were neck and neck on a winner of 5 games we played at AC. we were actually TIED on the last game.. BUT thankfully, my last mintue skills kicked in and i won the last game.. im looking forward to a rematch with james again.. his days of being a careless pool player are way over.. hes finally a competition alright..

Penthouse

2009-06-08T22:33:00.003+08:00

had a little practice at Shahid's house today for the upcomming talent quest.. and owh my god.. the guy lives in a fucking PENTHOUSE. i could literally see the whole of Subang.. irsyad and I just staggered looking at the place he was living in..

So the guys at first came up with this idea of making a musical, but it felt kind of too gay for me and asked for something else and we came up with Smooth by Santana.. im happy enough its not some musical which i know ill suck at. i just hope i dont fall off the stage when we perform in another 2 weeks

Ride

2009-06-07T23:33:00.002+08:00

i just feel like taking a LONG drive and just listen to any music that could sooth my soul.. theres nothing better than just you and your car and the things you could just get away from and take a breather from the wind blowing from the window.. sigh, i would love to have that right now....

Room 319

2009-06-03T23:58:00.008+08:00

wooh, i had fun alright

So yea, for the past 3 days, muiz, adrees, and I came up with a plan over 2 months ago to totaly skip a camp and do whatever we can during those three days.it was just something to make us feel free for awhile.. take a brake from all the stress we gotten from school and parents, Etc.well, that day finally came and we were all in the position of being last minute..LITERALLY

SUNDAY NIGHT:

FitRaY: whats the status on tomorow?!
muiz : we r on
muiz : adrees can come
FitRaY: HOTEL?!
FitRaY: thats the main problem now
muiz : nazrin will do it for us
muiz : adrees cuz
FitRaY: has the cousin called yet?
muiz : he is gettin the num
muiz : so chill
FitRaY: i have it
muiz : then pass it to adrees
FitRaY: hes not picking up!!
muiz : haih
muiz : just chill
FitRaY: we need the hotel by TOMOROW, how can i chill
muiz : fit
FitRaY: this is beyond last minute.
muiz : can u just think possitif
FitRaY: uhh, can you think logic..
muiz : dude the hotel is not full
muiz : me and tham went there
FitRaY: what IF, we dont get to have a room..
muiz : ok fuck this shit
muiz : we will get the fuckin room k
FitRaY: im being precautios..
FitRaY: aint my fault
muiz : i know
muiz : but ur freakin out
FitRaY: of course i am, we planned this months before and we still never did anything about the hotel
FitRaY: what happened to yothan?
muiz : i dont know
FitRaY: he comming or what?
muiz : he is
FitRaY: just make sure someone lets me know whats goin to happen tomrow..
FitRaY: what time should we meet up?
muiz : i dont know

like i said, LITERALLY..

MONDAY:
Thank god things came our way the next day.. i got enough money like the very last second(no joke).. and we did like Nazrin told us to do, walk in and get a room.. so we took a cab and did the most prioritised thing, which was to get a room and change Adrees's coins.. AGAIN, he brought 100 bucks worth of coins..

Me and Gautham did it the smart way and gave maybank a call and it turned out to be closed already..while they were busy talking their way through to getting a room.. and in the end we thankfully did. it was so easy.. the guy didnt even ask for IC's or what not.. we just paid the ammount and went upstairs.. The room was small, but cosy.. it even had a tv which had astro, a water heater, and the privallige to smoke in the room for 80 bucks a night.. now thats budgeting. The feeling was priceless, being independent and being there just to have fun with friends..

We headed off to pyramid to watch "Night At the Museum 2" that night, so we headed off there early than we should have..James called out of a sudden and asked if he could join the group for our 3 day outing and we couldnt help it but to say yes to the guy.. Me and Gautham went to Starbucks to meet up with him while Adrees and muiz were goin to see Sofia at her studio.. the guys took forever to meet back up.. the movie was hillarious, i couldnt stop laughing my ass off for almost every scene.. but the air-conditioning gave me a bad flu, and it was fuckingly annoying. through out the night.. getting back to the room was relaxing as hell, we were all tired but even that, got me ,james,and adrees to head downstairs to McD's...

TUESDAY:
we were all planned out and just hung out in the room as long as possible, when adrees had to change his coins again.. so we just went to the other side of the road and went to Maybank. i was lucky enough to have an account there. his coins were transfered to my account and his coins summed up to 88 bucks.. so i withdrawed RM90 and once again, we had money thanks to Adrees's coin collection..
That night, we unplannedly decided to go to Spaid in Glanmarie which was a small rave gathering for every school from subang.. Gautham and I had serious trouble on money cause the ticket was 35 bucks and we were real short on it.. Sofia came to the rescue and kindly lended us 50 bucks (THANK YOU SOFIA)..speaking of sofia, She was also the dj that night and she teared it up with the songs she played for everyone..i had a blast to just dance my through the night..

we all got out at 12 a.m being all dreanched with sweat, i would say that night was HAWT.. not tempreture wise, but enviroment wise.. from the guys to the girls, everyone was just lookin hot.. i gave myself a slap at the face after the show, cause of not dancing up to that specific girl i was looking at non-stop through out the night.. if had abit more balls that night, i swear, i would've had someone to dance with.. gosh she was eye boggling..
ANYWAYS, i felt bad for Muiz and Adrees cause they had to wait for an extra hour for another cab to get themselves home.. getting to eat McD's was heaven for me and James.. evryone slept like a baby that night..

WEDNESDAY:
so it was the last day of our Outing..and we were only broke. But thanks to the deposit money we got back, was enough for us to get another pack of ciggerets and food to saviour our starvation. we headed off inside of pyramid to cam-whore using James's HD camera he brought along.. things ended perfectly for all of us.. no one got hurt, no one died, no one was left behind.. i would say, a whole new level of Skipping was achieved.. we are seriously the Pontengers..

yes i know, this blog is fucking long.. im lifeless

Great Young Me

2009-05-30T22:55:00.005+08:00

which also satnds for.. GYM.. woooh!. i feel good again..

which also satnds for.. GYM.. woooh!. i feel good again..

well a promise was a promise from my mom that she would let me go when exams are over with.. and those 4 weeks of studying were LONG gone.. i did evrything i could today..

met up with james in the morning and had just plain talks and a good breakfast.
decided to shift to AC after that. and we played 8 solid rounds of pool.. and owh god, the guy got better at it more than i could think of.. it felt to me like he was finally a challenge than before.. (no offence james)..muiz finally called back and met up with us eventually.

had them tag along to parade for awhile and just walked around till parade made us think like theres nothing else to do.. i would still choose parade over pyramid anyday.. it has always been there for me since i was child.. and pyramid is way too crowded and its always been the place where i get pissed off..
anyways.. gym made me happier than ever, i would say, it made my week.. scratch that, made my MONTH.. yea, thats how much i love my gym. worked out my ass off..and this feeling of soreness has never felt better..

Im like a bird

2009-05-28T23:29:00.005+08:00

well, sort of. EXAMS ARE OVER..thats all i care

(yea, i know, thats not me)

gosh, the whole grewling 2 weeks of full on studying made me crack.. i still dont know how i did it, but i did..

The last paper which was Mathematics and i would say it was the cherry on top. i mean, i did alot of revising on it, and i really wanted to prove myself worthy. and i think i did. calculating this and that without hesitating to the extent which i usually did last year when i didnt know scrap.. an hour and a half just flew and next thing you know, people were screaming with joy. i was already giddy from the begining i started the paper. cause it was THE last paper..
i kept imagining if this is how people would behave on JUST mid-terms, imagine the end of SPM.. i would'nt be supprised if students would start throwing stones for no reason... now thats a sight im lookin forward to.

Deep breaths

2009-05-26T16:10:00.001+08:00

nothing but stress on my mind.. *fuck*

Remain calm

2009-05-24T20:27:00.003+08:00

im at the edge of my seat... i just need exams done and over with. too much on my mind, i need a decent relaxed outing with friends and just not think for SPM for
2-3 days or so. that day is comming...

laughters of the past

2009-05-24T00:09:00.006+08:00

i just miss you more than i could've imagined...i shouldntn have felt this no more

Socialising is key

2009-05-23T22:16:00.007+08:00

Okay my days where i say " wooh its been a long day"
well that record has been literally been broken today..

Started off the day with a morning jog in the moring like 6a.m,lift some weights, then just showerd and watched the tv.. a supprising call came in at 8.am from adrees.
we planned to go to mcd and study our agama.. and we did for about an hour or so. the guy had no other money but his coin collection of his 10 cents.. unconsiously met aziemah at Mcd.. she joined us, and we started counting and wraping 1 buck worth of 10 cents with paper of adrees's coins.. and owh god, we came up with 32 bucks!.. and that was just half of the bag he brought..

we came up with the idea to actually change all of it, and went to the maybank nearby
we had no idea banks closes during saturdays.. so we were stuck with the god damn coins.. so we just migrated to parade and walked to the mamak in parade and chilled there for awhile till adrees eagerly needed to go to school just to make a phone call to his dad.. so yea we did, and aziemah parted from us to meet up with her friends for a meeting.. took a cab to school.. we thought the driver said, its gonna cost 4 bucks.. turned out to be 8 when we reached.. the fee was fucking expensive from parade to 18.. then went down to the padang and met up with Jason and Gautham for abit.. then sofia came to pick us up from school to go to pyramid..* now you see the key word is "socialise"?*

we got there and aimlessly met aziemah, again, now in pyramid.. went to Pizza Hut and had lunch had some decent laughs.. adrees had to pay the bill with coins,, all of 22 bucks of it..*sigh*..left to starbucks to meet Vimal and have a smoke.. the guy took forever to come...by the time we did, adrees was running out of wrapped 10 cents.. sat down for like an hour just counting and wrapping the other coins left... came up with 60 bucks more..we bought almost everything with those coins..

so after everyone had to go, it was just me and adrees for the next 2 hours.. we walked aimlessly around and around pyramid while talking about life, friends we like and dislike and friends we were getting annoyed with, girls that wont just leave our minds, and the fact where we felt lonely. *fuck*.i've gotta say, felt good walking and talking with the guy..we finally settled down at sturbucks while we waited for his brother to send us home. the day wouldnt be the way it was without him for me..for that, Love you bro..

a good day it was,i finally had time to catch up with friends and not think about school for decent moment.. i wish i could have more of these days..

Ups and downs

2009-05-22T16:53:00.003+08:00

SOME people are saying, that blogging about exams are lame, but who gives a fuck.. blogging is ABOUT telling what you do or what you feel in daily things you go through..and i blog ALOT.. so seriously, fuck ya'll...

i have just realised that im better at studies when it invloves mainly calculation or common sense in it..i sucked to the max on econs today... i was happy enough that i could do the graph.. fuck econs, my future's got nothing to do with it..

I love maths? i do!

2009-05-21T23:25:00.002+08:00

well, kind of. i rocked on maths paper 2 today, and not just that, my one and only student, adrees, thought he did great too.. high fives were the main thing we could express to everyone..
haih,, paper 1, birng it on..

All that fuss? for what?

2009-05-20T23:29:00.004+08:00

wooh, thought today would never end..
started the dy off EARLY, like 5.30.. well, i slept through out the night from 7.. so i was charged up and i couldnt go back to sleep. so i went for a jog at 5.30a.m. yes, i jogged in the early ass morning.. made me run better actually cause it the air felt cold and fresh, so my breathing felt lighter as i kept on running..the funniest thing is, i witnessed an accident while i was jogging..and the guy went through the gaurding rail, and hit a few bushes and flipped on it's side with his viva.. it was all kinda far away but close enough to see, so i practicly laughed my ass off..

anyways, i was so unprepared for scince.. people were busy memorising things from books as soon i got to school., and i knew i had no chance, so i just gave up and just flipped through the book unconsciously.. best thing is, the paper was so EASY for me.. and i didnt study A THING... felt good through out both papers and just came home with a relaxed mind.. but fuck, maths is tomorow.. *Sigh*

Help !

2009-05-20T04:03:00.003+08:00

Fuck me, exams are starting already?!

well BM and add maths was yesterday and yes, i fucked up on add maths..
But today, today was a motherfucking bitch cause sejarah was THE motherfucker of all...

so the day started off with english, felt real good about the paper. its the ONLY paper where i can feel safe with. then after recess was sejarah.. and owh my gawhd, it was freakingly hard.. from the moment i opened the paper, my whole brain just went blank, and it felt like all the brain cells in my brain were on holiday.. there was literally NOTHING in my brain about sejarh.. its like its burns up everytime i read it..*Sigh*.. after just half an hour, one by one, started putting their heads on the table and close their papers.. it seemed like everyone was just down right giving up..(thank god i was not the only one then).. even after i woke up from sleep, there was still AN HOUR left.. but it felt like i slept for ages!.. so the pictures was my solution to pass time..

The only thing that made me stay sane

Solitude

2009-05-17T23:09:00.000+08:00

Its the word that ive been saying on and on..
and the feeling of lonesome gets stronger everyday..

*sigh*

Cracked Bottle

2009-05-17T17:52:00.000+08:00

okay, i cant stand it already..

Exams havent even started yet and im already cracking.. this is not good..
Besides that.. i have this gut feeling of being depressed half of the time.. everything thing that go throught every day just feels so dull these days. i seriously need something to do before i crack..

and news flash, Yours trully has gone fatter.. i looked in the mirror real good the moment i woke up, and it really hit me hard that i have gained weight.. because i know i have been eating alot.. and its annoying me cause i think it just the fact where i feel depressed most of the time.. Plus, i havent had a decent work out in 3 WEEKS!!! and i seriously feel blob-ish.. i need my gym back and fast. before im back to square one..

i just hope these 2 weeks are gonna past fast as possible.. i swear to god,the up comming School holidays are gonna be full workouts..cant wait

a day at sheraton

2009-05-17T17:21:00.000+08:00

so yesterday was the first birthday party i went to this year.. its was Tun's. so i rounded up the gang and just took off to his party.. We looked freaking radiculous cause of bringing the invitaion card knowing we didnt need to..

Anyways, by the time we got there, we met up with Sofia and Aziemah who were despreatly waiting for someone to entertain them... it seemed like we saved them from boredem.. Then Tun told us to head downstairs to eat, and EAT i did.. Nasi briani caught my eyes first cause i was freakingly hungry.. even that, still didnt satisfy me.. so me and adrees went and hunt for some more food.. He got attracted to this Caramell grilled beef, so both of us took a few slices with a side dish of tuna puffs which is THE best tuna puffs ive ever had.. there was an actual moment when i was on the table and i said "im finally happy" cause of the food i was eating..
Sang happy birthday for Tun, and went up to get a smoke.. i felt so satisfied and relaxed.. Yothan couldnt stop bugging to take pictures so in the end, we did..ALOT. fuck you yothan...

Irsyad came up with a game to go on elevators and try and meet up on the same floor..
the most fun thing we did through out the whole time..He was my partner during the game, and we kept on meeting sofia and muiz on every floor. no idea why..The girls wanted to go to the pool area, so we did.. Muiz got randomly thrown into the pool by everyone and i was tryin to stay away from anyone that wanted to try push me in..

Had Sofia's dad to send me back and as bad luck as i was, i was smoking 2 mintues before he came.. wasnt my fault.. she said her dad was comming in half an hour.. So yea, he knew i smoked.. (sorry sofia)..

all in all.. a good day it was..

A Nightmare come true

2009-05-14T00:14:00.000+08:00

It was our 5th fly day this month we had today, and the crowd of people following us were down to the original trio. Muiz, me, and Adrees. We did the all the normal things we could. Breakfast, CC, Study, Pool, then finally lunch..

Gautham eventually joined us throught the study session and he freaked us out cause of his Owh so scary calculation he made about "how many days we're ACTUALLY left before SPM".. which meant all the time of the normal things we do PER day like sleeping, eating , taking a bath.. etc etc are cut off from the 24 hours we spend everyday.. and the guy summed up the numbers and it turned out we were left 80 FUCKING DAYS LEFT.. or 256 hours per subject in counting.. the pressure is always building.. i dont know how i can take it much longer. the tense situation almost made me vomit and almost made adrees go to the top floor of Inti College building and jump off of it..

Speaking of adrees, worst of the worst happened to him. EVERYTHING was going fine, it was already after school by then, and we were at Bistro drinking our drinks that we could only afford for ourselves...
THEN, *ringing tone from adrees's phone* came out, caller ID says that it was his brother Shane, and we were all thinking nothing was goin to happen untill he picked up the phone.. " Did you ponteng school today?cause the school call daddy" ..BAM from there on, we knew he was a dead man.. i myself was shivering.. fuck school man. they seriously dont have a life and start entering peoples lives..

The worst part is, everytime when you actually do try to do something right, it tends out to be wrong somehow or another..

im not letting go, im moving on

2009-05-12T01:00:00.000+08:00

" i can live without you, but without you ill be misserable"

Saya Memang Pukimak

2009-05-12T00:37:00.001+08:00

SMP as we all know is the motherfucker of the school.

So there i was, in class listening to his lessons and his fucked up accent in 2 periods of Mod maths.
Out of a sudden, he stareted judging people one by one what we would get on this up comming exam...
"you, 50-70%", "you, 60-70%" when it came to me, he took at least 5 seconds to say it
"YOU, 20-30%" so i went.."HUH" and he said " Betul, saya tengok muka kamu pun saya dah tahu kau akan fail.."
WHAT THE FUCK?!.. i scored at least 50 last semester you Son of a fuck!..
i mean it pissed me off the whole day because of ONE line he said. i swear, if there wasnt any rules in school, would've thrown my calculator at his fat fucked head..
WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU TO JUDGE YOU FUCK STICK!!..
Its hard enough i have to be there in your class,, go suck someone elses balls you shitface!!

Improvising

2009-05-10T20:16:00.000+08:00

Well, my days on the treadmele are over.. for now. since i cant go to gym till after exams.. so i plugged on my earphones and ran around the whole of SS17 TWICE.. felt good knowing a guy my size could do that without even getting tired.. i swear, i didnt feel tired at all eventhough my shirt was dreanched with my sweat. literally.
Adrees called me out of a sudden and told me to join him in Canai 15.. but i was wet like hell, so me as the hardcore fan of adrees, did the right thing by goin all the way back to my house and take a shower, AND all the way back to Canai 15..

*Sigh* .the things i usually do for my bestfriends

BIG mistake

2009-05-07T23:47:00.000+08:00

Its like what almost everyone says.
"I HATE SCHOOL!!"or "I NEED TO GET OUT OF SCHOOL!"
well folks, those words are absolutely, negatively, and fuckingly, true.
It showed how much i get from school everyday,Nothing..
im just glad that i have That much friends to make me forget about it.
Seriously, i study more than i do in school when i skip it with friends and have a study group.. i dont get pressure, or bored, or the need to walk out of class and not study!.
All i know, im SO god damn happy that its my last year in school.. though its gonna be sad to those who have to still be in school by next year.. good luck chumps!.
all i have to do now, is to handle it for another 6 months somehow..

Tic Toc, Tic Toc.....

2009-05-06T23:41:00.000+08:00

Another fly day for the trio today.. and the best part is, time was moving slowly as possible.. even after i got back home. things were still sloth-ish..
weird, but ill accept it as a good thing. cause no one likes rushes..

Smartest thing we've done

2009-05-05T18:47:00.001+08:00

he looks like a girl with short hair with a mole on his cheek

So today was a good one i'll say.. finally got my wish to skip school.
Best part is, none of us planned to study at AC, but magicly, all of us brought books..
so after a game of COD in FTZ, we went up and started opening our books.. the enviroment was better than ever.. i mean a place where you can study with air conditioning ,choice of drinks to buy, and the privallage to smoke WHILE studying, felt awesome.
So since Adrees had problems with his maths, i taught him a few or two.. and the guy couldnt stop celebrating for every answer he got right.. feels good to teach a friend. Makes yourself feel alot better and smarter... All i know, the last thing i need is for my mom to drive up my ass for the bad results i got last semester.. im just hoping to do real good on the up comming mid-year. *fingers crossed*

God knows his jokes alright..

2009-05-04T23:16:00.000+08:00

Spending my time in school feels good at times.. such as today where i gave full concentration on every period.. and it made me feel smart somewhere inside..
then after school, i had a study session with Quraisha at McD's.. and even I taught her on a few questions.. its actually been awhile since ive teached someone that im good at.. and all of that made me feel good..

But when it came to tuition at night, things just fell apart when i started discussing the exam questions the teacher gave us.. and as embarassing as it sounds. i got 8/88.. i have no idea what went wrong.. when she came to me and tried to discuss a question that only i didnt know, i barely understood what she was saying when the question was freaking easy... i felt like smacking MYSELF in the face knowing how stupid i felt..

sometimes, when you think things are just fine and dandy, life just knows how to screw it up for you somehow.. literally, im Six feet from the edge.

it makes me think about life more than ever.

gay date? dont think so.

2009-05-03T12:26:00.000+08:00

So i started off the day with at 9.a.m with tuition. yes, tuition. i mean whats "better"than tuition in the god damn morning.
anyways, the original plan was to watch X-Men origins at curve after that. but apparently there was no more space for james who made a last minute desicion.. and the our only transport was irsyad's parents... due to the last minute plan, his parents got mad. (sorry irsyad).. so the whole mood just shut me down and both of us decided not to go..

in the end, we went to parade to have a drink.. then out of a sudden, james's cousin called to join him at pyramid.. so we used the most independable way to get arround, a taxi.. the driver was fastest driver ive ever had.. we got there from parade in 5 mins.. by the time we got there, his cousin called and said that he could'nt come.. so there i was, stuck with james in pyramid.again.
the guy was generous/gay enough to buy a set of popcorn and drinks..

Watching X-Men gave me a boner.. Gambit wowed me from the moment he used his powers..
Wolverine sicked me out since his original claws were made out of bone but still made my eyes dropped everytime he killed everybody.. all in all.. the movie was the best ive seen this year.

So, on the way home in the cab., the driver turn off his radio and started talkin about how life is actually simple.. his advice was " just dont get caught"... he was goin on and on about how usually people fail in life cause they get caught on what they do.. it occured to me how insane his advice was, cause apparently we smelt like cigerette and the guy was busy saying to us "make sure you wash up when you get home, you wouldnt want your parents to know" in the begging of the conversation.. i didnt really know if he was looking up for us or him being an old man.. god knows. All i know Its hard to find a good driver like him these days..

Labour day

2009-05-01T21:34:00.000+08:00

Okay, today was a LONG one. i am actually tried just because the sheer amount of time i was out.

Spent Labour day with my buddy Irsyad.. met up in Chanai 15 for breakfast and just chilled our way through. in the end, we still ended up in a FTZ at AC. played a few heart dropping rounds of COD4 and just had a blast letting go our stress out on the game. Felt like the devil for abit cause i asked the guy to hang out for another hour instead of going to friday prayers.. felt real bad for that

speaking of which, first of may is my dad's birthday as well.. so the moment i got home from my hangout with irsyad, my mom brought the family out to Subang Parade. what a better place to spend time with the family right?. my mom got him a new toy to play with, a new laptop to be exact.. checked out some TV's to get and ended the day by goin to Manhattan Fish Market. me and my sisters orderd this big ass platter which made me feel like a balloon. literally.. felt kind of good to spend time with the family.. Happy 52nd birthday dad!

"On a beach topless" Imagination perhaps?

2009-04-28T22:41:00.000+08:00

Gym days for me are always satisfying. i always get the feeling to just workout my ass off till i can hear my muscles crying... and for some reason, it always feels good afterwards.. some people say i got fatter, some people say i still look the same since i started gym some time ago. and some say i got buffer. who to listen to? i dont know.. i feel fat, i am fat.

But ever since Shane gave me that encouraging talk a few days back, i am seriously trying to stay away from food that keeps my "excess baggage" sticking around. or Irsyad would like to call it Love Handles. Cardio's has been my priority when i hit the gym.. and i always make sure i push myself..

BUT according to my MOM, i cant go after my monthly pass expires. since the up coming exams which will torture myself even more.. Which, sucks motherfucking ass!. i mean its the only time where i get some lonely time out by myself.. and its one of the only things that i look forward to during the owh so boring weeks i go through..

life feels like its getting cramped up into a smaller and smaller box everyday. gosh.
Sometimes i wish there were no rules at all.

Ex-Am

2009-04-27T23:26:00.000+08:00

its comming!

Gosh, everyones busy with this and that.. and plus the whole pressure on Mid-term which is coming up in another 2 weeks is making me feel like dropping out of school already..

I dont understand how those straight A students does it. but i would love to learn their techniecs. im done making everyone dissapointed in myself.. i cant lose another year of fails in my exams.. its the last year ill ever have in school... time to make it worth while.

like i said to Adrees sometime ago, " Its time for change man"

Headaches are Asses

2009-04-26T19:10:00.000+08:00

Sundays are the usual, just the normal futsal in the morning, had breakfast with irsyad. had a good chat,. In the end, the guy dumped me for a game called Left 4 dead. Which F.Y.I is making everyone getting addicted to ... no offence to those hardcore fans, i would say "the game sucks"..

Anyways, i decided not to end my day early and took a bus and went to see Maison all the in Usj 1. Call me gay. i missed the guy alrite. by the time i got there, he as well was playing the game that irsyad left me for on his new 360 which he wouldnt stop bragging about.. tried playing Call Of Duty on it, gave me and Effing headache... so i just dropped down the controler and called it quits. went up to his room, and the guy had shisha.. my tingling throat just couldnt resist and started sucking the pipe.. (which gave me a Bigger headache). Kind of dosed off on his couch cause of the unbareable headache while the guy kept on talking on the phone with his 'girlfriends' . motherfucking player.

All in all, i had a relaxing day with my buds.
Note : bring panadol everywhere from now on.